Ups and downs

I am tired and I'm in pain and it's also that time of month (am I allowed to say this idk oops)

But filming has semi concluded!! I'm still missing a few shots from the argument scene with my mom, the making tea scene, and the flashback with the teacup scene. Here are my fellow actors on set today:


I will get the rest done tomorrow. Today just wasn't the day. I have been overloaded with school work and been filming for 5 hours straight. I was also filming bits of Yejin's project today. I don't know if I mentioned this (i think i did) but I was supposed to act in their project with by brother, but due to the circumstances, me and my brother weren't able to. So instead I'm filming some scenes and sending them over! This did take up time and was quite stressful at times because my brother would complain!!!! And I was tired of it!!! But we finished and I was happy with what I filmed. I hope Yejin and Joey like it too🥺

After this, I had to shoot my own project. I had the intention of wrapping up filming completely and maybe even start editing but noooooooodnjbnhnev. No. I know I fill finish tomorrow and I know I will have time finish it before the deadline. All because of an angel called Tina who decided to extend the dealine for the CCR (u rock Tdog (am i allowed to call u this i don't know either but yea ur cool)). This is what honestly worried me the most—not having a good quality CCR because I would have to rush things.

I am much more at peace now. But I admit I am scared and stressed. My aim is to be transparent in here so I will say it. I'm scared I won't be 100% happy with my outcome. I'm pretty sure ze media people are going through the same thing. This portfolio project was going to be that last piece of us we would leave behind in high school as we went out into the world. We wanted to pour all of our creativity into this project and showcase it with pride and satisfaction. It is nobody's fault that this is going on but I know it has decreased our general motivation.

Maybe it's some stupid meta-narrative thing. The whole "second semester senior year is the best!!! you have fun!! prom! graduation! it's the peak of your life!!!!!!!!!!" thing. But I feel like this is all hitting all at once and has caused that sense of not having anything to look forward to anytime soon. I MISS MY MEDIA PEOPLE. Aka "ze media cult". I miss going to class and doing recommendations. dsfghjopcgyuijouhiygtr im SAD.

aaaaaanfskjkwgd i don't know. This is ranty, I know. I just wanted to vent. I want this project to be everything I wanted it to. But if it doesn't turn out, I was thinking that I could remake it in the future with better actors (sorry mom and Phil) and better audio.

I wanted to end this post on a nice positive note. The new Strokes album (The New Abnormal) came out today and I love it so much. It's exactly what I needed amidst this mess lol. That music video I've been mentioning a lot in here—that song is on the album. This album made me realize how much I love music and bands and how much artists have helped me. Picture me at 2am crying while listening to Ode To The Mets. I am so incredibly thankful.

This is their album cover. It's a piece by Basquiat (also one of my favorite artists) called Bird on Money.

How to make tea

Today I decided I would film the last scene—the one where I make myself a cup of tea and I do not drink it. Here's the very messy and not completely complete shot list:

These are the props I gathered:

I had a teapot, a kettle, and the tea itself, and I gathered this teacup with the dainty lace placemat. Filming this by myself was a task because:

a) I had to record the audio and footage simultaneously

b) I had to set up the composition of the shots and then check them through the screen on my camera

c) I did very very extreme high angle shots and well, you can guess how that went. It involved standing on chairs and attempting to scoop tea from up there.

Thank the universe for tripods. I seriously don't know what I would do without them.

This scene ended up being wayyyy more time consuming that I thought, and recorded about 12 shots in 3 hours. I was tired by the end, and I still haven't finished this scene. I still have to film the shots where I appear.

Nonetheless, I had to stage the drying rack next to the sink, and I think I did a pretty good job:

Did a little bit of color coordination there. It was tough because my kitchen isn't exactly pretty. It's a mix of warm brown wood and black marble, which I admit is slightly tacky when trying to make a scene look pretty. I will definitely be experimenting with color grading!!!

I plan to finish shooting everything tomorrow, or at least complete the scenes with my mom and brother, just so I can stop bugging them and relax a little. 

CCR (kinda sorta)

So I admit I've fallen behind schedule and haven't concluded with the filming yet BUT, I have been working on my CCR questions meanwhile. 

Here's what I've written so far for each of them. I feel like I can't elaborate much yet because I haven't finalized any of the three components (short film, postcard, and website), but here's a draft kinda thing.

1) How do your products use or challenge conventions and how do they represent social groups or issues?

Short film:
Use conventions:

• lengthwise
• beginning, middle and end

Challenge conventions:

• Experimental, avant garde
• not the conventional setting, climax, and resolution

Postcard:

• Emphasis on common conventions of a postcard:
• Stamp
• "Greetings from..."

Website:

• Uses film website conventions
• dynamic
• big images
• links to social media
• stills from the film 

Social groups: families, people who experience loss for the first time, children who aren't really aware of what loss is

Social issues: loss, grief, family conflict, child innocence

2) How do the elements of your production work together to create a sense of 'branding'?

• Through imagery 
• Postcard reflects themes of death and also images of fish
• Website would have images that are seen on the film
• Film title font same on all products and platforms

3) How do your products engage with the audience and how would they be distributed as real media products?

Short film
Engagement: it will be watched!!! and hopefully create a sense of empathy and sincerity
Distribution: Film festivals, website (linked to), youtube, vimeo

Post card
Engagement: would have the audience go to the theater to collect their stamp and watch the film (scavenger hunt type thing)
Distribution: around film festival

Website
Engagement: stills of the film, links to social media
Distribution: linked to my social media and the festival's social media 

4) How did you integrate technologies—software, hardware and online—in this project?

Software: Final cut pro, photoshop

Hardware: Camera, microphone

Online: Wix website, music???, research

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Filming will be concluded tomorrow and editing will finally start!!!

I should've expected this

So it isn't happening and I want to burst and cry!!!!!!!! I'm upset that I won't be able to produce this to the best of my ability. Sure, I'll have a good mic for my future projects but like ://///

I'll try using the mic on my earbuds, or just stick to the mic I had before. I'll figure it out. aahEjshdfjhsgjhjwbhieuccbgrhfsiersnjoi utotabuiurfjghdjawbry r :((((((((((((((((((((

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7:35 PM

Update: I'm kind of an idiot. I happened to suddenly remember a very important detail: my neighbor is a film student.

We have a mic now!!!!!!!!!!!! jhfjkhdgj yay

Fish can fly

I finally have the final idea for the postcard!!! What I did was I incorporated my two previous design ideas together, and it turns out, they reflect a part of the dialogue in the film.

"He's gone to heaven and he's swimming in the sky with all the other fish"

This is a draft LOL but this is basically the way it will be arranged. It's gonna be very postcard-esque text with fish swimming (or flying) around the sky and clouds. My art skills are no good for this. Which is why my very talented and extremely creative friend Yejin will be helping me out!!! I will be shooting some scenes for their portfolio project from my house, and in return I'm getting help with art stuffs :)))

I also happened to have this tiny card type thing I bought at the school art fair a few months ago, and I thought something like this would look really cool:

I absolutely loved it when I saw it and I bought it. The colors!!!! The fish!!! The serenity it evokes!!! Credits to the artist whom I don't personally know but I hope she's doing well!!!

I will keep updates on how the art will be looking. I have yet to brainstorm a bit more with Yejin :-)

They also made this really friggen cute sketch on how we basically met (thought I'd post it here for contextual purposes):

Shoutout to u star!!! I appreciate u a lot :-)

Deja Vu

Guess who's once again ordering a mic from Amazon, very last minute. Me. I guess I'll just make this a tradition for every single one of my projects. Just order a mic online and I'm good to go. So, am I behind??? Yes. But I do it for quality purposes.

I'm still waiting for it to get here, it'll be two days. So, hopefully Sunday or Monday will be my last filming day.

It's a lapel mic I ordered by the way! I just really wanted good quality sound for the dialogue so...I had to.

So yes, we will be waiting a little longer :////

Branches and bunnies

It's day 2 of filming!!!!!

So my family makes up my entire cast, and they haven't really been in the mood to be on camera the past few days. But today's the day. I plan to shoot all of the monologue scenes today and all the other scenes tomorrow. So hopefully I can start editing tomorrow or Friday. I am calm though, because I have been working on my CCR and done research on websites. I think I'm on track.

Also, quick unrelated update! I got into my dream school for the Bachelor of Media Studies a few days ago. This is HUGE and I'm really happy with how far I've gotten :))))). UBC here I come (once this corona thing is over)!!!

Anyways, here's the shotlist we'll be going with!! I made a few changes, and I really liked my mom's suggestion: instead of doing the faucet thing she suggested I could show a little kid stepping on the roots of a tree, trying to not fall into the grass.

Also, I desperately needed a child for these scenes, so my neighbor and friend Ari helped me out and will be playing "mini me". Look how cute she is:

It was easy to have her act because she literally lives next door, which is super convenient. Also, fun fact, she came over barefoot and with that dress on. I did not think of asking her to wear a specific outfit, but the way she showed up was perfect!!!!!

We shot the scenes where she was outside walking on the tree branches, and they turned out super cute. My mom also had the great idea to have her hold a stuffed animal while she was walking around the branches, so I dug around my closet and found this bunny from when I was a baby. It was perfect.



Shooting the "night" scenes where really fun. It was obviously weird for a 6 year old to stick her finger under a 40 year old woman's nose (that isn't her mom). The angles and composition of the shots were a little improvised. But then again, this is a fully experimental film.

This is Ari slightly scared of my mom                                          This is her tucked in my sister's bed!

                                           

The tables have turned^                                                                 This is me having a little moment of                                                                                                       doubt and Ari not knowing what to do

We ended up dressing her in one of my sister's pjs with little kittens in it, which was really cute. I also had to experiment a lot with the lighting. As it was nightime I had to make it look a little dark, but when I turned off the bedroom lights it was way too dark, so I turned on the lamp on the nightstand from the other side of the bed, and managed to get very a nice, warm and subtle light. I'll definitely explain a little more of the visual aspects once I go into editing. I will do some color-grading!

I still have to shoot some of the other monologue scenes tomorrow, where my parents appear. Hopefully we will wrap it up tomorrow. I've decided I might have to borrow a mic from one of my fellow media people. I jest really want good audio🥺

But yes!!! Everything's going well. My mom and brother are already practicing their lines for tomorrow. I'm excited for these scenes.